Lets call her Bear Woman and him.... Octopus Man.
Octopus Man: Whoa hun, whats wrong?
Bear Woman: Nothing, I am fine.
OM: Well you do not look fine.
BW: What is that supposed to mean, are you saying I am fat?
OM: No of course not, you are as beautiful as the day I married you.
BW: Yeah right, that was five years and five pounds ago, you think I am fat, you probably think I look like a bear!
OM: Now why would I think that?
BW: Because I saw you checking out that woman the other day, you now that beautiful one with the paws.
OM: You know I would never look at another woman...
BW: Yeah right, you are such a liar!
OM: Okay quit it now, you are getting all fired up for nothing, you are beautiful and I was not checking anyone out.
BW: Oh hunny you are so wonderful I could just eat you up.
OM: Well lets try some role playing like we did the other weekend when little Johnny went to his friends house.
BW: Oh roar.
OW: Okay I am a octopus, and you are a wild bear.
BW: Okay grab my wrists and pretend like you are going to swallow me whole.
OW: Okay now you look at me all ferociously and act like you are going to bite me, show me your teeth!
BW: Wait a minute, why would a bear and an octopus be trying to have sex with eachother?
OW: Too late, I'm done that was great! Can you go make me a sandwich?
Follow Me so you never miss a rant!
Send me your rants!
I like this new idea, keep them coming!
ReplyDeleteOk love it! I have a rant. how do I get it to you???
ReplyDelete@anonymous- anyone can either email me your rants or send them to me on my send me your rants-comment section, which ever you prefer.
ReplyDeleteAlrighty! I'll email you. What is your email? (PS it may be right in front of me and I can't find it because this computer is old as a shit hole)
ReplyDeleteGOT IT! Damn ass computer.
ReplyDeletePerfect
ReplyDeleteHahah! Love this. And thanks for the shout out. I hope you do more of these. It made me laugh. One of my fave parts was at the beginning when she's all, "what are you saying I'm fat?" when he said she didn't look fine. Hi-Larious!
ReplyDeletefunny, it adds some much needed personality to your blog, so glad I stumbled upon it though, will bookmark this one for sure
ReplyDeleteAwesome idea, and I think you'll got a lot of emails...
ReplyDelete
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