Thursday, July 15, 2010

Wher Have All the Good Women Gone?

Queen,
I wish I could find a woman who had the same morals and principles the majority of them had back in the 1940's or 50's. I'm only 27 yrs old, and every female that wants to date me has had sex with more than 10 partners. The majority of them by the time they are 21 have a child or children, but never married, and still like to go out and get drunk at least once a week.

I'm not by any means saying the male population is perfect, but over the decades we have not really changed. Personally I don't want a woman who treats sex as casually as a handshake. I consider myself EXTREMELY picky and selective when it comes to women. I've been on 8 dates in the past 3 months, and 6 of them were wanting to have sex on the first date... at that point I just have to walk away. Because I know I'm definitely not the first one they've done that with.

I'm just curious what possesses a woman to have sex with SO many guys at such a young age? Don't make excuses like alcohol and crap like that. So many of you women yap all day about how you want respect and want a real man and want a guy to respect you and stuff... but seriously... how can we when you've let a guy get between your legs and up inside you that you met at a club one night and never talked to again. How can we respect you when you LET a guy use you?

I don't get it... Maybe I'm just old fashioned.

I'm also curious how many all of you women on here have had sex with, and what your reasons are if the number is high and what not. Feel free to share your age and number. I really don't get it and frankly if all the girls out there are like this, I may be single for quite some time, because I won't settle for someone like that. For the record, I'm 27, and I've only had sex with 2 women. The first was a long time high school sweetheart I was with for a long time, and the 2nd was my fiance who died in a car wreck by a drunk driver. I just don't see what so wrong about waiting til you're in love to have sex. 

17 comments:

  1. I am sorry you lost your fiancé to a drunk driver. That must still be a very heartbreaking thing to have live through.

    I wanted to respond to your question regarding what happened to women and our moral principles. Please keep in mind, my answer is solely based on my own experiences and observations and by all means does not represent the entire female population.

    I would like to bring attention to something you had written, “I’m not by any means saying the male population is perfect, but over the decades we have not really changed.”
    What this sounds like to me is that you are excusing men’s sexual behavior because, “boys will be boys”. Please keep in mind that just because men had the freedom to have more sexual partners to “spread the seed” as the behavior is often excused as, women may have been a little more sexual than you assume they had been in the 40’s and 50’s. But, because it has not been socially accepted – women had to be more discreet about whom they were sleeping with.

    You also mentioned the young single mothers – that have never been married. I would like to know where are the fathers and how much responsibility are they taking for helping to produce this child? Did these boys offer to marry the girls? I think in the 40’s and 50’s – when a boy got a girl pregnant – marriage was often something that encouraged by the families to help uphold the image of their families.

    My personal experience has taught me that even when a woman tries to be the good girl and “wait” for either love or marriage – that this is not a guarantee that the man will be faithful. My question is, why should a woman work to maintain her virtue when in the end more often than not – a man will want to seek sexual encounters outside of the relationship? You can see this for yourself with the majority of married men (and yes, there are married women too – but, not to the same extent).

    And finally one more point – as you questioned, “How can we respect you when you LET a guy use you?” Why do you assume she let the guy “use” her? Just as men have urges to relieve sexual tension – maybe she “used” the guy to relieve her sexual tension. My point is, women and men are not objects to be “used” – but, often when a woman has sex – it is assumed she is being used. But, ironically when a man has sex I don’t hear that expression instead it is often associated with his money – this is when we hear the terminology, “she’s using him”.
    Please don’t dismiss a girl because she has had frequent sexual encounters – maybe you can teach her something she has not experienced. If waiting is something she wants to try with you and if the two of you enjoy each other’s company – then why not give her the chance?

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  2. It's called no self respect. I am 56 and have slept with only 5 men my entire life. I had been in a relationship for 12 years, it ended in 2002. I have not slept with anyone since then. I can not pick someone up for sex. There has to be "feelings" for me to sleep with someone. I have no children. I think alot of these young girls think they will get a guy to marry them if they get knocked up. Guess what....single mothers. I have several nieces who are in their early 20's who have a child and some that have more than one.I also know they go to bars and get stinking drunk and go home with the 1st guy who pays any attention to them. It is sad to think you will find a long and lasting, loving relationship with someone you hooked up with while you were drunk. Good luck with that. I personally don't think trapping someone will work. I also don't think being drunk is a good excuse, so if they were sober they would not have??? I would rather be alone than try and trap someone into marriage.Anyway, I like the old fashioned relationships also. What about the men who pick them up? They also contribute to the problem...use a condom, I don't care if the girl say's she is using birth control or not, protect yourself don't depend or belive someone just because they said so.

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  3. Personally, I think women that have sex w/alot of men are doing so either because they think its expected ( just a thought) or they have such low self esteem... btw where are all the good guys? why is it that men who are in their 50's think they can still attract women that are 20 years their junior??? I'm 55 widowed and was in a relationship for 4 1/2 yrs.. w/someone that was 9 mos. older... he and I do not look our age and the reason it did not work out was because of his entitlement issues as well as drinking...and to be honest since I don't look my age I would prefer to date someone who doesn't look as if they were my father... Me, shallow? Not in the least... I am sure there are men out there that either come from a good gene pool or take care of themselves... Just looking for equality...

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  4. @Queen: your comment about single mothers... what happened to women taking preventative measures? can't put blame on lack of education.. nor can we put the blame or responsibility on males... both parties are held accountable...I've never had an unwanted pregnancy, my girls never have had one either and both are 29 and 25.

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  5. @Chrissy I know it is not just the mans responsibility, this rant really made me mad, as women have a bad rap which I dont even know anymore if we deserve it, so I was just trying to enlighten him as he is bashing single mothers, and there are plenty of single moms out there that are not single because they are sluts ( I HATE THAT WORD) which is what he was leading into...
    it plays on that last post about the boob naked girl, I mean women are not all that innocent anymore, which I have only recently come to realize, ahhh I am so confused... who is right???

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  6. You know ten guys for a girl is ALOT, but ten girls for a guy he gets labelled a pussy, I think this is society deeming women inappropriate because they have had multiple partners???? Do I think all women should have sex with who ever they want to know, but who's to say you cannot fall in love with more then one guy in your life....

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  7. @Queen: still double standard out there, unfortunately,...and yes, definitely bashing which i don't get unless he has been w/women who have slept w/every Tom, Dick or Harry? Both sexes should cool it on the bashing and be accountable.. After all both made a choice to jump into bed and whether both are responsible in the bc dept. is another subject...As they say never ASS-U-ME... lol

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  8. @Chrissy, agree completely with your comment, I am the queen of double standards (my later ego) I think it is a problem for both sexes and society in general!

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  9. It's tough out there, truly...for everyone on every path. There are double standards that are impossible to ignore. Some say I'm doing things right; some say I'm doing things wrong. Is there a right and a wrong? I suppose it depends on who you speak with. I think we just move along the best way we know, making decisions that we feel are the best possible ones for us individually.

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  10. I am in my middle/upper twenties- married with 3 children. I was not raised a christian- instead I was raised in a permissive world but despite my upbringing I had a choie and I made it. I refused to have sex while in school- I had serious relationships that were long term, became engaged and the man was a true gentlemen saying he wanted to wait till our wedding night. Sadly while he was in the military he was lost to me. I moved on and graduated from highschool and a few years later met the man who is now my husband. We raise our children to know that sex is not something to be taken lightly. It something you should only share with a person who plan to spend the rest of your life with.

    Thru histpry men have cheated on with women and at times it was considered socially acceptable. Women have also cheated but were forced to be more discreet with their indescretions. It is up to every individual to set thereselves to a higher standard and do what they believe is morrally right. Raise yoru children to have morals, to have old world courtesy. It seems that here in the U.S when they allowed sexual content to be the norm when it comes to tv shows, movies, magazines, reading content thats when things began sliding down hill faster.

    I have friends- both male and female who waited till they were married. I know a 27yr old man who was a virgin on his wedding night. I personally feel that being called a relic, a throwback is just fine. Id rather be a virgin or only have a couple sexual partners my entire life vs being known as a slut...

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  11. I think the person here ('Kalei's best friend')who mentioned self-esteem is on the right lines. If you have too low self-esteem and someone's prepared to sleep with you, then I guess that helps make you feel good (for 5 minutes at least); likewise, if you have too high self-esteem you put yourself around like there's no tomorrow because you think you're so bloody marvellous. No 'normal' bloke is going to say no to a woman who's prepared to bed him - that's just part of his sexual psyche. Therefore I suppose it's the ones in the middle of those two poles, the ones that are basically happy in themselves and who feel confident with who they are, which are most likely not to be sleeping with hundreds of guys and are happy to 'wait' for Mr Right to come along.

    For most of us, our lives are likely to have periods when our self-esteem is low, and periods when it is high, and periods when it is somewhere in between. I guess how many people we have slept with reflects those different periods of our lives.

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  12. that's the first time I say a blog is cool. yours is cool

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  13. @her on the hill, your last statement was marvelous, spot on!

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  14. Two things.

    The first thing is that I, as a girl, find sex both liberating and a release. Generally speaking, that is. So on a date, if I am attracted to the person and their personality, there's no reason I wouldn't consider doing it.
    Okay, so it doesn't equate to loving sex, but you still get half the experience and what's more, you can have fun!

    Secondly, your thing about the nightclub scene or whatever.

    I met a guy in the worst of places - a club - and it seemed like it would be a one-nighter. Except we met up the next day, and the day after, and we started dating - just like that, from being total strangers.

    The thing is, *I* thought along the same lines as you - that it could never be serious because of how it started out. It (and some other things) lead me to being really insecure about our relationship, and it took splitting up to realise how we really felt about each other.

    The moral? In just over a month we'll be celebrating our first anniversary. Okay, that's not that long, but had I not been so insecure it would have been our second.

    So, sure, everyone's different, but it doesn't necessarily run the way you say it does.

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  15. Marie says: I'm twenty and have never slept with anyone! I plan on staying a virgin till I get married! I decided I would wait till the guy was willing to be with me forever!

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  16. with so many very nasty women that have a very serious attitude problem today, meeting a good honest one that doesn't cheat would certainly be a miracle for many of us serious straight guys today.

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Let it out...

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